Joe Biden Promises International Crises Within Six Months of Barack Obama Being Elected

Joe Biden has said some crazy stuff in the 30+ years he’s been in office.  Heck, he’s said some pretty crazy stuff since he was announced as Barack Obama’s vice presidential choice for running mate.  However, I don’t think he, or any other politician at this level of government has ever said anything so insanely crazy as what Joe Biden has said now:

ABC News’ Matthew Jaffe Reports: Sen. Joe Biden, D-Del., on Sunday guaranteed that if elected, Sen. Barack Obama., D-Ill., will be tested by an international crisis within his first six months in power and he will need supporters to stand by him as he makes tough, and possibly unpopular, decisions.

“Mark my words,” the Democratic vice presidential nominee warned at the second of his two Seattle fundraisers Sunday. “It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking. We’re about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator president of the United States of America. Remember I said it standing here if you don’t remember anything else I said. Watch, we’re gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy.”

“I can give you at least four or five scenarios from where it might originate,” Biden said to Emerald City supporters, mentioning the Middle East and Russia as possibilities. “And he’s gonna need help. And the kind of help he’s gonna need is, he’s gonna need you – not financially to help him – we’re gonna need you to use your influence, your influence within the community, to stand with him.  Because it’s not gonna be apparent initially, it’s not gonna be apparent that we’re right.”

Not only will the next administration have to deal with foreign affairs issues, Biden warned, but also with the current economic crisis.

“Gird your loins,” Biden told the crowd. “We’re gonna win with your help, God willing, we’re gonna win, but this is not gonna be an easy ride. This president, the next president, is gonna be left with the most significant task. It’s like cleaning the Augean stables, man. This is more than just, this is more than – think about it, literally, think about it – this is more than just a capital crisis, this is more than just markets. This is a systemic problem we have with this economy.”

The Delaware lawmaker managed to rake in an estimated $1 million total from his two money hauls at the downtown Sheraton, the same hotel where four years ago Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., clinched the Democratic nomination. Despite warning about the difficulties the next administration will face, Biden said the Democratic ticket is equipped to meet the challenges head on.

“I’ve forgotten more about foreign policy than most of my colleagues know, so I’m not being falsely humble with you.  I think I can be value added, but this guy has it,” the Senate Foreign Relations chairman said of Obama. “This guy has it. But he’s gonna need your help.  Because I promise you, you all are gonna be sitting here a year from now going, ‘Oh my God, why are they there in the polls? Why is the polling so down? Why is this thing so tough?’ We’re gonna have to make some incredibly tough decisions in the first two years.  So I’m asking you now, I’m asking you now, be prepared to stick with us.  Remember the faith you had at this point because you’re going to have to reinforce us.”

“There are gonna be a lot of you who want to go, ‘Whoa, wait a minute, yo, whoa, whoa, I don’t know about that decision’,” Biden continued.  “Because if you think the decision is sound when they’re made, which I believe you will when they’re made, they’re not likely to be as popular as they are sound. Because if they’re popular, they’re probably not sound.”

Biden emphasized that the mountainous Afghanistan-Pakistan border is of particular concern, with Osama bin Laden “alive and well” and Pakistan “bristling with nuclear weapons.”

“You literally can see what these kids are up against, our kids in that region,” Biden said in recalling when his helicopter was forced down due to a snowstorm there. “The place is crawling with al Qaeda. And it’s real.”

“We do not have the military capacity, nor have we ever, quite frankly, in the last 20 years, to dictate outcomes,” he cautioned. “It’s so much more important than that. It’s so much more complicated than that. And Barack gets it.”

After speaking for just over a quarter of an hour, Biden noticed the media presence in the back of the small ballroom.

“I probably shouldn’t have said all this because it dawned on me that the press is here,” he joked.

“All kidding aside, these guys have left us in a God-awful place,” he then said of the Bush regime, promptly wrapping up his remarks. “We have the ability to straighten it out. It’s gonna take a little bit of time, so I ask you to stay with us. Stay with us.”

I don’t even know where to begin.

Does this sound to anyone like he’s promising an Obama administration is going to help generate an international crises?  I’m sure he’s not saying that, but that’s what it sounds like.  Why is he even saying all of this?  How can he already guarantee there’s going to be an international crises?  How can he guarantee that Obama supporters aren’t going to like Obama’s response to the crises?  How in the world can he be so certain of all of this? This just blows my mind.

On top of the actual theme of what he was saying he actually said some crazy and interesting stuff within the text itself as well.

• He guarantees a “generated” crises within six months that will test the mettle of Obama.
• He’s already saying that it won’t be apparent that the administration’s response to the crises is the right response.  In fact, he’s saying that it will seem that it’s not.  How in the world Biden can know there will be a crises and that Obama will answer the crises with an unpopular response is just way beyond me.
• He uses the phrase “gird your loins” which I pretty much never hear outside of church.  I don’t think it’s all that significant, but it’s an interesting thing for him to say.
• He’s already predicting that their poll numbers will plummet after they take office.  That’s not really a stretch for me.  I figure once people realize they just elected a Socialist as their President the poll numbers are bound to go down.  I’m guessing Biden understands that as well and is already preparing their supporters for it since, as we all know, Obama already has this election wrapped up (that’s sarcasm for those of you who don’t know me).
• Biden says that people will be skeptical of their decisions.  He argues that the decisions will be sound but not popular because “if they’re popular, they’re probably not sound.”  Which of course makes me wonder why they’ve been harping on Bush all this time.  They are the ones making his decisions unpopular which, by Biden’s argument, means that Bush’s decisions are probably pretty sound…
• Biden makes the statement, “We do not have the military capacity, nor have we ever, quite frankly, in the last 20 years, to dictate outcomes.”  What?  So for the last 20 years we haven’t had the military capability to win a war?  That’s what he’s really saying.  This, of course, overlooks both Gulf Wars and the war in Afghanistan for which we certainly had the military capability to dictate the outcome.  This is an idiotic statement from a Senator who’s been voting against pretty much every single military proposal that would strengthen our military since he’s been in office.  If he really thinks we have such a sorry military why didn’t he do something about it as a Senator for the past 30+ years?
• Biden played Oracle for 15 minutes before he even noticed there was press in the room.  He shut up soon afterwards.  It really makes me wonder what the heck he says behind closed doors.

Once again I’m at a total loss for words at something from the Obama/Biden ticket.  I mean, I’m usually at a loss for words when I try to verbalize Obama’s plans since they make little sense, but Biden really takes the cake with this one.

Anyone have any thoughts on what this crazy rant was about?